During the depths of the financial crisis it was not exactly surprising that more young adults, facing poor job prospects, moved back home with their parents. But far from a temporary, recession-induced phenomenon, kids continue to boomerang home. The Pew Research Center found that nearly one third of 18- to 34-year-olds currently live with a parent(s). That’s a pronounced generational shift from 23 percent in 1960. For the first time in 130 years, shacking up with Mom and/or Dad was the most common living arrangement for young adults, edging out being married/cohabitating, living alone, or living with someone other than a parent.

The good news is that more than half of parents with boomerang kids at home are happy to have them back under the same roof, according to an Allianz Life Insurance survey. The not-so-great news: More than a third of parents with an adult child living at home say it causes financial stress. The upshot, according to Allianz, is that 48 percent of parents with a boomerang child say they are on track to meet their financial goals, compared to 53 percent of households without a grown child on the premises.

“Having an adult child living at home can be a positive social trend, but only if it’s approached in the right way,” says Katie Libbe, Vice President, Consumer Marketing and Solutions at Allianz. That means laying down some financial house rules that will benefit both generations.

Rules to Live By

No freeloading. Even if you don’t need a dime from your child to stay on track with your financial goals, your kid will benefit from you expecting them to be financially responsible. That means making sure you have the right frame of mind. “Parents should be the safety net, not the bank,” says Libbe.

Set goals. Ideally, before you have an adult child living at home, have “the talk.” That is, a discussion about what your financial expectations are. “You need to teach your child how to be independent. That doesn’t happen without talking through goals,” says Anthony Criscuolo, a certified financial planner at Palisades Hudson Financial Group in Fort Lauderdale, Fla. Criscuolo says to discuss how long your child will be living at home. The timeline can, of course, change, but an open-ended arrangement “doesn’t incentivize the child to work toward independence,” says Criscuolo.

Share bills. If your child remains on your cell plan and health insurance plan, and even if they are driving a car you’re paying for, Criscuolo says it is important to start discussing what those costs are, regardless of whether you want to start charging them for their share or not. “Remember, the goal is to educate. Just paying for everything doesn’t teach a thing.”

Insist your child saves up. Charging rent is one option—especially if it helps you stay on course with your own financial goals, but the bigger parental win can come from setting clear monthly savings goals for your child that will enable his or her independence. That means an auto deposit into a savings account that will eventually become your child’s security deposit on a rental (or a down payment on a home, if all parties are comfortable with a longer stay) and another savings account that becomes an emergency fund when she eventually is ready and able to move out.

Use a credit card (seriously.) Young adults living at home or not are increasingly leaning on debit cards, rather than credit cards. While pay-as-you-go debit cards make plenty of sense, transactions with a debit card are not reported to the credit bureaus, and thus do not help build a strong credit score. Using a credit card responsibly is a key way your children can use early adulthood to build a strong credit score. That’s going to make it less expensive when your child is ready to flex her independence. A solid credit score can often mean not having to make a deposit for a cell phone, or utilities, and may even be the tipping point factor that entices a landlord to rent to your kid.